7 months later….

Gosh doesn’t time fly when you’re having fun eating takeaways and cancelling your gym membership!!

This month’s trial is diet chef! I’ve got my big box of food and it’s actually really bloody tasty, I mean I haven’t lost any weight but that could have been the macdonalds and fried chicken I ate on top of the calorie controlled food but it’s really nice and easy when you stick to it…..

One positive though is that I haven’t gained any weight. I haven’t lost anything but I haven’t gained!  Whoop!

I have a work do in April where we’re going to a trampoline park, there’s a weight limit and currently I’m at that weight limit (that was a bit of a shocker) so it’s given me a bit of a kick up the arse to lose a few pounds at least before then so I don’t have an embarassing, sitting on the side holding handbags moment.

The big news this week is that the online dating has kicked in again. God I hate it, I hate dating, I hate searching for people, I hate letting people down, I hate the weird messages I get (too rude to put on this blog) but I’m going for it. I’m going to force myself to date and if they don’t like an arse that jiggles then move on. Wish me luck!!

Breaking that barrier continued….

I just had to do a little update. I’ve been to the gym twice now. Boom. 

If I don’t lose even half a pound on Tuesday then, well I don’t know what but I’ll be bloody grumpy. 

I’m even going to go to the gym tomorrow AND Sunday! Maybe. 

Update! Just did another 5k today on the cross trainer. COME ON! 

Breaking that barrier

So it’s been two weeks now that I’ve stayed the same weight. Increasingly annoying and frustrating but also bloody expensive!!! Whoever said that eating healthy doesn’t have to be pricey is dead wrong. All this fresh fruit and veg is an absolute fortune!!!! 

The plan to break through this barrier is exercise I’ve decided. So in 2 weeks I’ve been to the gym once…buuuuut I did sign myself up for a 10k walk in July and also a 23k trek eeeeek!!!! I have no idea why.

5k on a cross trainer once is enough practice right???

Snacking in secret

I’ve developed a really bad habit of snacking secretly or just eating massive meals in secret. The other day I made a trip to boots to get “toiletries” I was totally just going so I could eat a sandwich and crisps in my car. 

I need to snap out of this. I’m sabotaging myself! I did read an article the other week which perfectly summed up how I feel when I lose weight and I’m wondering whether deep down I am actually purposely sabotaging myself (getting deep today.) It makes me extremely uncomfortable and I can’t bear talking about it with people (but I want to, hence the blog!) and I couldn’t describe why before but someone else eloquently put it. Basically losing weight is fab and I look so much better but you constantly have people looking at your body and commenting on it. Even though it’s positive it makes me feel a little queasy! Also I HATE it when people say “you look sooooo good!” Did I not look good before? Because I think I look fucking fabulous either way. 

I’m going with slimming world!

I’ve lasted 3 weigh ins which is a record for me! Lost 8lb which I’m happy with since I haven’t been doing it properly…. Don’t tell the group leader! Even got myself a tificate!

Going strong

2nd weigh in was 2.5 lb so I’m 6 down after 2 weeks. Weigh in tomorrow. I’m not feeling so positive this month. Need to crack on with my food diary. That bugger really works!

Which diet is going to be “the one” for me?

So let’s recap…. I’ve done weight watchers, the milk diet, the egg diet, 5:2, Rosemary Conley, Atkins, 10lb in 10 days, no sugar, lean in 15, raw juicing, nutribullet smoothies, maple syrup diet, Hollywood 48 hour diet, I even tried the bulletproof thing where you have butter in your coffee…. Oh my god the list is endless. I’ve resulted in going back to slimming world. I have a buddy and we started last week, the only way I’m sticking to this is because I’ve moved home so my mums cooking for me!!

Week one was good. I drank a lot and ate some pizza but lost 3.5 lb so that’s pretty good. Second weigh in is on Tuesday. I’m getting nervous that I won’t lose! The motto of our group and that my friend and I now keep texting each other (along with photos of burgers and pizzas were eating) is “there’s no shame in gain!”

This is possibly the worst motto for a slimming group right? I want consequences for my actions! 

I’m dog/house sitting for another friend this weekend so I got myself sorted with all SW recipes and food and going out for dog walks. I feel like I’m on a health retreat…. I did have a dominos Friday though, lucky there’s no shame in gain eh!

I start a new job on Tuesday and I don’t know about lunches, my main concern is not that there’s only going to be shit to eat or just chips and fried food, no I’m nervous that I’m not going to have anyone to have lunch with!! I’ll keep you updated though. In the meantime here’s a photo of my slimming world carbonara dinner which is “free with a healthy extra a” aka I can eat shit loads but just a little cheese on top. 

Why do I have no will power??

Someone please explain to me why I am so greedy and useless as not eating… I actually can’t stick to anything for more than a week and its driving me insane!

All I can think of right now is what to have for lunch…I have my milk and coconut yoghurt with me for lunch so of course we’re going to go to the local bakery and get a massive baguette. USELESS!!!!

On top of this my friend isn’t going to spin so I’m now debating cancelling that. I know I’ll cancel as well but I need to wait a few hours first and at least pretend like I’m considering it. I need a good excuse…

I forgot to moo

Milk milk milk, it’s all I can taste or smell. I’ve been cheating and having a meal each day, I just can’t bring myself to stomach so much milk! I have been better on the exercise front though and going back to spin class and aqua aerobics (I was surprisingly flexible in the last class!)

Wednesday is my next “real” day for the diet so I’m going to try and be milk only for 7 days straight as that’s my check up with the nutritionist, I best have lost something or I’ll get in trouble.

Also treated myself to a fitbit flex, have to say it is completely pointless! Apart from the nice alarm in the morning waking me up, the thing just tracks my steps which are never enough and my calories which are either too low or too high. I just can’t find my happy medium!

I’m going to start mooing soon

I’ve been away for a while again and a lot has changed. I mentioned my holiday last time and that has been and gone and almost forgotten already…

I asked to be referred to a nutritionist at the Docs and have had a couple appointments so far. The usual thing of low calorie diets and doing a food plan in the first one but the second one, they have put me on a milk diet!

Each day I am allowed 4 pints of semi skimmed milk. That’s it. Well I can also have diet drinks, sweetener, tea and coffee. I did it for 5 days last week and lost 9lb and then had the weekend off and put on 5lb! Also, a word of warning, don’t drink 8 jaegarbombs in a row with only milk in your stomach, it doesn’t end well.

It seems a really unrealistic, unhealthy and an impossible-to-maintain diet. I’ve been reading up on it and it seems to be a pre-op diet that you follow for 10 days max but I’ve been told I can do it for 2 months…and its primary goal is to shrink your liver (I think) for your op. I’ll stick with it for a while as its actually easy and filling (and cheap!) and I’ve got my next appointment in 2 weeks so I’ll be asking a lot more questions then, especially about how I would start reintroducing food again without piling the pounds back on again.

I’m going to go have my mug of warm milk and get back to work! Watch this space!